Labor Day BBQ

Yesterday I went to Nikki's house down near Atlantic City for her annual Labor Day BBQ. Each year the crowd grows as more kids pop up. This year was a complete zoo.

Karen's husband Rob was the entertainment as he plugged his guitar in for a one man show. As more alcohol was consumed, it turned into amature hour as the hostess and guests hopped on mic for their moment in the spotlight.

I was no exception.



Nikki and Karen tortured us with their interpretation of Kenny Rodger's "The Gambler". What's especially great is their complete disregard to the timing of the song. They just sing as if Rob wasn't even playing.

The First Wedding

A few weeks ago, my vacation started with a whirlwind of activity. Friday night was a wedding in New Jersey and Saturday night was a wedding in Puerto Rico. They both were fun, lively and very entertaining, but I was exhausted.

I was just sent the link to the photographer's of the first wedding blog. Todd Laffler's pictures are quite simply stunning. He shoots as a photojournalist and I love it.

My mom did a reading at the ceremony. That's her in the photo.

The pictures were so great, I had to look at his other stuff. Check them out. They're all amazing. And I know how great they are because I don't even know these people and the emotion in them is making me get all mushy.

How much is too much?

I have my Twitter account to automatically update my Facebook status. Usually, it's pretty funny and so what if it shows that I update my status about 5 times a day.

But yesterday I was so aggravated by people talking in an office behind me, that I just did what I normally did and Twittered about it.

Today, a coworker asked me about my Facebook status and asked what that was about. "Who were you listening to?" She wasn't being combative in asking, she was just humored and curious. I had to quickly think on my feet because I wasn't about to tell her that she was one half of the duo who I wanted to impale.

"That was for all the talking that was going on around me. I was trying to write something and I kept getting distracted."

It's crazy how I can lie with a straight face.

So the dilemma is, do I have to censor myself on Twitter? Should I disconnect Twitter from automatically updating Facebook? Should I de-friend her? (I already de-friended my manager because I didn't want him having that close of a peek into my personal life - especially if I like to rant about work every now and then.)

Back to real life

I'm back from vacation. I arrived Sunday morning at JFK airport and was stuffed into an SUV with 6 other people and all our luggage wedged in between us for an hour ride home.

I wish I could be more enthusiastic about telling stories about my trip. But I'm too tired. My body aches, my stomach hurts and I just want to sleep. Funny that these symptoms didn't show up until I was home.

I did have a good time, don't get me wrong. Hanging out in an apartment with my brother, my cousins and one of their boyfriends gave me a closeness with actual humans that I've been longing for for a while. Even our annoyances with each other became funny. We were the '5 Assholes' who were quick to pull away from the rest of the group to do our own thing.

I'm annoyed with myself that I didn't even write in my journal while I was there. I had no desire to remove myself from 'being in the moment' to stop what I was doing to write down the stories of the day. Now I might forget the drama that went on the whole week.

Being home, I have to concern myself with my homework again. I'm not motivated. I have to get back into work mode. I can't decide if I like my job today. I have to think about working on those home improvement projects that I've been letting slide. I don't feel like figuring out where the money is going to come from. I would rather just float on a raft in the warm waters of the Caribbean ocean letting the waves rock me to sleep.

Vacation: Day Five

I've been totally lame and not posting, but whatever. I'm on vacation. I am mad at myself for not even journaling because I am going to forget the ridiculous things that has happened so far.

Most of it has been stupid 'in the moment' things that us cousins will probably only find funny. There's been a lot of laughing, and drinking and swimming and more laughing. But there's also been plenty of drama. I attribute that to the merging of families and the stress that goes along with that.

But my Blackberry isn't working here and it's pissing me off. No phone service, no text message, no nothing.

Off to get some dinner.

More later.

Vacation: Day One

I’ve been up since 5am. It’s now 7:42 am. I didn’t go to bed until 1am last night. Do you see where this is going?

I’m at JFK airport waiting to board my plane to Puerto Rico. There’s a family wedding there tonight. I was at a family wedding in NJ last night. I’m already all wedding’ed out.

I love to travel, but I hate… let me repeat. I HATE the whole check in process.

I arrive to the airport curbside, loaded up with luggage, backpack, dive bag, two parents, aunt & uncle and a million other clueless passengers. Already, there’s a line out on the curb for curbside checkin. Inside is another line weaved in and out among chaos.

Being in an airport changes you. It turns normally sensible, logical people into babbling idiots. It turns me, a normally sweet, thoughtful and caring person (Mike, stop laughing) into a raging, homicidal maniac. I want to kill every stupid person next to me, in front of me, behind me, who breathes the wrong way or asks a stupid question like, “What do you mean I have to show my boarding pass?”

The security check in line is the worst. Security is a stupid name to call it, because the yahoos who work there look like they just got off their night shift at McDonald’s.

There was one woman who had to keep going through the metal detector because she kept setting it off. I wanted to smack her. First off with the shoes, then the belt, then the change in the pocket. “Your earrings!!” I yelled to her as she went through the third time, holding up everyone waiting behind her – like me. Finally she made it through without setting it off and I clapped.

I can see my stuff already through the x-ray machine, laptop sitting on the conveyor belt vulnerable. I just want to get through so I can claim it before someone else does.

Now that I’m through and on the other side of the gate I can breathe a little easier. I’m starving and dehydrated, but the first thing I spot is a free internet hot-spot and the addicted cyber-geek in me practically drools and my first instinct is to blog rather than find some sustenance. Sad, I know.

I’ll be on my plane in about an hour. I’m still waiting for my cousin Christine and her family to arrive. Her parents are already here and waiting for her at check in. Me, I just have to keep my cool, read some cheesy magazines and listen to my iPod. It will be a long week. I’ll keep you posted.

My doppelganger

Me in cartoon land.
Make your own at
www.faceyourmanga.com

Do we look like 80's groupies?

Last night Viv and I went to see Poison play at the PNC Arts Center in Homdel, NJ. The people watching there was awesome. We saw plenty of aged rockers who looked like they partied hard in the 80's. Women who might have been hot once, now were victims of gravity, cheese steaks and hair dye. But that didn't stop one woman from pouring herself into a red leather strapless dress that barely held her in.

Sebastian Bach from Skid Row and Dokken both opened up for Poison. Neither of them were anywhere near their vocal range from their heyday. I was in the food court while Sebastian was on stage. All I heard was screaming. We went up on the lawn to watch Dokken, but I was pretty disappointed when Don didn't hit the high notes/screams that he was known for.

Finally the lights went down and Poison took the stage at around 9:00. Musically, and lyrically the are not Grammy contenders. Even time had taken a toll on Brett's good looks. He was looking a little haggard and bloated. Poor, Brett.

CC Deville was a silly, little maniac. He pranced around on stage with his glittery guitar, checked his hair in his mirror, and egged on the audience for more cheering. That clown is all ego, but he held up the best out of all the band mates.

The show itself was pretty short. Only an hour, fifteen minutes in total. CC Deville had a guitar solo and Rikki Rocket had his drum solo which took about 10 to 15 minutes out of actual band play time.

But what they did play was fun, eternal adolescent stuff. I was brought back to junior high when my jeans were tight, my hair was high and I would be caught dead without my studded belt and feather earrings on.

It was a naive time then. Singing about "in the old man's Ford; behind the bushes; till I'm screaming for more-more-more" was just that. Just singing. Love only lasted as long as a hook up in the closet at a party and the only worries were who was going to win MTV's Friday Night Video Fights and making sure that Billy Warner didn't get my note where I told my best friend that he was cute.

Sometimes I wish I was fourteen again.

a typical conversation: part 6

I was looking for the seat height adjuster on Mike's chair to make his seat go down.

Mike: My thing is broken. It doesn't work anymore.

Me: That's what she said...

(as I was walking away)

Thank you, goodnight! Try the veal...

80's Flashback

In preparation for tomorrow's Poison concert, here's a picture of me when I sang Dokken's "In My Dreams" during my 8th grade talent show in 1987.

You gotta love the feathered hair and fringe jeans.

Internet Meme Timeline

Dipity created this awesome Meme timeline. Normally songs and smells bring me back to a specific memory, but now you can think about where you were when the first South Park Spirit of Christmas cartoon circulated the web in 1996. Ah... such good times.

a typical IM conversation

Steve: ok, enough office bashing for today

Steve: I feel like a jerk!

me: you should. i'm telling

Steve: now I will punch YOU

me: no. because i have on my protective cloak with a shield charm

Steve: a shield charm

Steve: I would punch the shield charm RIGHT THROUGH YOU!

me: no, my pet unicorn will trample you and impale you with its horn

Steve: I would break the horn of the uni-horn and stab it to death with it

Steve: stumped you didn't i

Steve: (totally)

Steve: ha!

Steve: sucker!

me: no because my doppelganger will throw things at you for ever until you die

Steve: I will dangle your doppelganger from the roof by her toenails while I bludgeon you with your own dog.... then I will do it again to your doppelganger and say "this was so much fun. Why didn't I think of this before!?"

me: no because i will punch you

Routine

I came across this post about finding ways to reclaim your time from the barrage of things that suck up hours of the day. I was most interested in the first item on the list.

Take a time out. Freeing up your time starts with taking a step back to take a good look at your life. You need to block off at least an hour. Several hours or half a day is better. A whole day would be awesome. A weekend would be even more ideal, though not necessary practical for many folks. With this block of time, take a look at your life with some perspective. Is it what you’ve always wanted? How would you get to where you’ve always wanted to be? What do you enjoy doing, but don’t have enough time to do? What things actually fill up your day? Are there things you could drop or minimize to make more time? We’ll look at some of these things in the following items, but it starts with taking a time out to think and plan.

Let's look at the things that occupy my day:

• Let Barry out, then go back to sleep for 30 minutes. As Barry eats breakfast, I either lounge in bed for those last precious minutes, watch tv or lately, do some pilates.
• Take Barry for his morning walk.
• Shower and get ready for work.
• Drive 30 minutes to work.
• Eat breakfast, read personal emails, comics, news, blogs, links, and gossip with coworkers. By 9:00 - 9:15 ish the work day begins.
• For the next 8 hours I hop between reading/writing emails, updating content in courses, editing graphics, chatting with Mike and Steve, internet surfing, eating, phone calls, meetings...
• 30 minute drive home.
• Let Barry out and feed him.
• Make dinner, eat and watch the news on tv.
• 7:00pm take Barry for his hour long walk.
• From 8 to 10 I'm online again either doing homework or blogging/surfing/reading.
• By 10 pm I'm in bed reading a book until I fall asleep.

Hmm... not a very exciting life now that I'm taking a closer look at it. Maybe instead of school, I should take up juggling.

Stony Brook Farm

This past Saturday, my family converged in upstate New York at my cousin's country home, Stony Brook Farm. It's a beautiful home that's perfect for hosting and entertaining plenty of guests.

I drove up there with my brother and Barry through a crazy rain that I thought would never let up. Finally we arrived and was amazed at all the new construction and landscaping that was done since last year. The most fun additions were a pond and a pool on their 42 acres of land.

The pond was warm and soon it was full of kids and adults and even my dog as we enjoyed the rare opportunity for some cooling off in the waterin' hole. The mud squished between my toes along the bottom. There were diving contests off the rocks. Frogs croaked along the banks. All I needed was an inner tube raft and a beer.

There was also some excitement. Ryan locked his keys in the trunk of his car and had to call AAA to unlock the car. It was quite an event as we all cheered on the porch as the rescue truck drove down the driveway. Poor Ryan, he's not even in the family yet but he gets as much crap as anyone else. He had to put up with being the butt of the jokes for the rest of the day. But at least he's the star of his own video.

Family gatherings are always special. They don't need to be fancy, just as long as there's food, everyone's happy. What's really wonderful is how the cousins have grown up so close and now the new generation of cousins get to experience the same closeness that we have. They will always know that their family will be there to turn to for laughs and for comfort.

I feel very lucky to have the family that I do. I know I don't tell them that often enough.

See the photo slideshow.

The Big Read

I completely lifted this post from another blog, but right now I can't remember where from.
The Big Read, an initiative by the National Endowment for the Arts, has estimated that the average adult has only read 6 of the top 100 books they’ve printed (though the list seems to be missing #44 and #51, and I couldn't find it at the website). How do you rank? I read 24 books on the list.

1) Look at the list and bold those you have read.
2) Italicize those you intend to read.
3) Underline the books you LOVE.

1. Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2. The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien
3. Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4. Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5. To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6. The Bible
7. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8. Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9. His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10. Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11. Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12. Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13. Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14. Complete Works of Shakespeare
15. Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16. The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17. Birdsong - Sebastian Faulks
18. Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19. The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20. Middlemarch - George Eliot
21. Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22. The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald
23. Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24. War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25. The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27. Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28. Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29. Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30. The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31. Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32. David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33. Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34. Emma - Jane Austen
35. Persuasion - Jane Austen
36. The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37. The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38. Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39. Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40. Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41. Animal Farm - George Orwell
42. The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43. One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
45. The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46. Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47. Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48. The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49. Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50. Atonement - Ian McEwan
52. Dune - Frank Herbert
53. Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54. Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55. A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56. The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57. A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58. Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60. Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61. Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62. Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63. The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64. The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65. Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66. On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67. Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68. Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69. Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70. Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71. Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72. Dracula - Bram Stoker
73. The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74. Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75. Ulysses - James Joyce
76. The Bell Jar - Sylvia Plath
77. Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78. Germinal - Emile Zola
79. Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80. Possession - AS Byatt
81. A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82. Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83. The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84. The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86. A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87. Charlotte’s Web - EB White
88. The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89. Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90. The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton
91. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92. The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93. The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks
94. Watership Down - Richard Adams
95. A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96. A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98. Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99. Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100. Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

More Meeting Notes

Either I have ADD, or meetings need to be more purposeful.

Don't Stop Googling My Twitter

I was killing time at work this afternoon and decided to Google my online handle. I was amazed at just what results came up: Twitter posts, posts on blogs, blog comments, my name on other people's blogs. And most amazingly, a lot of my photos that I have hosted on Flickr have been used in online presentations, articles, and travel sites all over!

Here are my photos:

• on a Chicago travel site
• used in a slide show (slide #68)
• on a Huey Lewis artist site
• a stock photo aggregation site
• in a hotel review
• on a wiki type page
• a Philadelphia travel site
• a consumer advocate site
• on a Tampa travel page and on their iPhone app page
  

A few reporters have even found me through my photos on Flickr.

The first time was in March 2007, when a Wall Street Journal reporter was doing a story on VIP only areas of exclusive vacation hotels. She found this photo of me lounging in the infinity pool of the El Conquistador Hotel in Puerto Rico. First she sent me questions over email and then she called me for a phone interview. You can read the final article Class Warfare at the Infinity Pool. I was even quoted!

At the El Conquistador Resort in Puerto Rico, Claudine Caro infiltrated the infinity pool during her four-night stay last August. The pool is meant for use by guests of Las Casitas Village, a small complex adjacent to the main building. (There, current peak-season room rates start at $269 a night -- about $40 more than a room in the main resort. One-bedrooms start at $485.) Ms. Caro, a 33-year-old in South Brunswick, N.J., who develops educational courses for a pharmaceutical company, and her cousin visited the pool twice around dinnertime, when there weren't any attendants around. "We walked in like we owned the place," she says.

After my 15 minutes of fame were up from that, I got another 15 minutes. CNN was preparing a series of stories of road trips, and being that I just finished my Laid-Off Blues road trip, I sent in my story. Not only was it featured in a CNN iReport piece, I was interviewed again over the phone and they developed a multimedia slide show with me narrating!



It blows my mind how this crazy thing called the internet, which I dove into head first in 1995, now chronicles my life in ways I could never have imagined. In some ways, its a little frightening and I do need to be aware of what I'm putting out there, but for the most part, it makes the world a much smaller place.

What I do when no one is listening

Barry is my friend. And being my friend, he gets special treats that only a real friend would get. He gets his own songs sung for him in his honor.

My made-up songs are usually sung to the tune of commonly-known diddies, often using variations of Barry's name (Barry Fuzznoze, Barry Dog) and some activity, usually smelling his butt.

So today I will enlighten you with some more songs to get stuck in your head.

(Sung to the tune of "You Are My Sunshine")

You are my fuzznose, my Barry Fuzznose
You are so fuzzy, I like your nose
You never know, nose
How much I know, nose
How you like to smell your butt.

(Sung to the tune of the "Oscar Mayer Bologna" song)

My Barry has a first name, it's B-A-R-R-Y
My Barry has a second name it's F-U-Z-Z-nose
I like to squish him every day
And if you ask me why I'll say
That Barry Fuzznose has a way
Of smelling his butt every day

(sung to the tune of the "Lone Ranger Theme")

Barry dog, Barry dog, Barry dog dog dog
Barry dog, Barry dog, Barry dog dog dog
Barry dog, Barry dog, Barry dog dog dog
Yooou are a Barry dog.

Meeting notes

These were my 'notes' from the last project manager meeting at work.

My namesakes

On my way into work this morning, a blast from the past song came up on my iPod. Samantha Fox's "I Wannna Have Some Fun". Come on, you remember her, the English model/singer from the late 80's.

Well hearing that song brings up memories of a tidbit of silly information on me.

I had gone to CCD, which is like Sunday school, except it was on Saturday morning. It was pretty much a social event since you got to hang out with your friends from school for an hour on the weekend. You stated in first grade and went all the way through to 8th grade where it all culminated with Confirmation, where you receive the sacrament of the Holy Spirit.

The best part about Confirmation was that you got to choose your Confirmation name. I didn't have a middle name so I thought it would be cool to finally get one. And it was all my choice!

Typically you would select a proper Christian name from the Bible. Friends had chose Mary, Elizabeth, Theresa. Not me. I chose Samantha. I wanted a rock star middle name and at that time, the coolest slut was Samantha Fox. (Lita Ford was also an option, but 'Lita' just didn't sound right with my name.)

Not to ignore my first name, it also has a story.

My dad was a fan of Claudine Longet, a popular singer/actress/dancer from Paris of the 60's and 70's. She was married to Andy Williams and later dated skier "Spider" Sabich. She was later arrested for 'accidentally' killing Spider by shooting him in the back, but was acquitted because of mishandling of evidence and other police blunders. She then later married her defense lawyer who left his wife and children to be with her.

So there you have it, folks. I'm named after a homicidal beauty home-wrecker and a bimbo slut.

Where does your name come from?

Single Rage

Have you ever been so infuriated that you wanted to straddle some guys neck just so you could pummel him in the face multiple times?

This weekend I was with my cousin at her boyfriend's house, hanging out at a family BBQ before we went off to see "The Dark Knight". I had met the family before at the Superbowl party. They were warm, welcoming and pretty cool so I had no insecurities about being there. I did notice that the boyfriend's brother paid extra attention to me. I could actually feel him looking at me. It was not a reciprocal feeling on my end.

We were sitting around the table eating when The Brother overhears me telling my cousin about my date the next day.

"You don't have a boyfriend? You're single?"

"Yup."

"Why? You're a nice looking girl."

"Um, I don't know. "

"Even been married before?"

"Nope."

"Really? What's wrong with you?!"

Oh. My. God. AREYOUFUCKINGKIDDINGME?

The rage begins with a fire in my chest quickly radiating out to my extremities actually causing my fists to flex. I quickly had to reel it in because I was a guest and I didn't want to embarrass my cousin.

This guy... this F'n GUY, is most likely someone who would give you the shirt off his back to help you. He's probably really sweet once you get to know him. He probably thought it was some sort of back-handed compliment or his perverse method of flirting. But I only met him once and on the surface, he mainly comes off as a jackass.

And really, fuck him! Divorced (I think) father of one who wouldn't be hurt by eating a salad once in a while. His love life isn't one for a Hollywood happy-ever-after story.

I had to coolly respond, "What makes you think that there's some problem with ME that I'm single?"

I think he saw how ferocious I was and the conversation was dropped. He also (wisely) decided to not go to the movies with us as originally planned.

So really? What's up with that question?

I've heard it often enough from distant aunts "you can't wait forever... what are you waiting for?...you're not getting any younger..." Each time it gets responded with a gritted smile and giggle but the rage is there. The last time I lost it and said "Well, I've never been married, therefore I've never been divorced and I consider that a pretty good thing," to my divorced aunt. Whatever. Screw her.

I don't necessarily like being single, but I'll take it any day over settling for some ho-hum guy just so I can say that I'm not alone. And I hate having to defend that to family and ass-clowns who think they're trying to be cute.

Today's Horoscope

You know, the universe doesn't always care if you're looking for romance or not. Some days (like today), you just get a big ol' dose of flirtatious energy. Consider yourself lucky to be blessed like this, and start using that energy! Smile at as many cuties as you can -- and maybe at some not-so-cuties, too! You're all about making other people feel good, which in turn will make you feel good, too. Blow kisses to grumpy-looking folks and watch their frown turn upside down.

What a very appropriate horoscope today as I HAVE A DATE! And while I am interested in getting to know the person I'm meeting, I'm just more excited to be back in circulation (so to speak) and to have the universe smiling on me today.

Wish me luck.

a typical conversation: part 5

Mike is talking to Steve, who can't hear because his headphones are in.

Me: You need a trajectory object to throw at him.

Mike: I'll throw my balls at him.

(He meant his golf balls trophy that he had hanging on the wall.)

Talking Crap

I was so happy when I got home today and found a package waiting for me at my front door. Skim had sent me a present and imagine how excited I was when I opened it up to find "What's Your Poo Telling You?" by Josh Richman and Anish Sheth, M.D. Thank you, Skim! I love it.

Yes, poop stories make me laugh. My poop, your poop, the dog's poop, even strangers' poop. It's the one thing that all living things have in common, so why not laugh about it. In fact, if you want to laugh, here's the funniest poop story I have ever read. Even thinking about it now makes me laugh out loud.

Anyway, now with my new book, I will be able to always have some blog fodder to share with you even when I've run out of things to say.

For example, here's one interesting nugget of information:

On a trip to Vienna, the White House flew in a special presidential crapper so that President George W. Bush's crap could be collected and disposed of in a secure manner. Secret Service agents capture Presidential Poo in order to prevent foreign intelligence agencies from collecting health information about the commander in chief's health. Governmental agencies, including the US CIA and the Israeli Mossad, have used this approach to gain valuable information on the health status of world leaders such as Mikhail Gorbachev and former Syrian President Hafez al-Assad.

So looks like the writers of Scrubs were right when they said to "check the poo".

The Power of Three

If I had three frivolous wishes to use only on myself, here's what they would be:

1. Be 30 pounds lighter
2. Be $300,000 richer
3. Have 30 more vacation days

What are your three wishes?

Musical Morning

Here's just a random sampling of music that got me through my morning:

Lay Your Hands On Me (slow version) - Bon Jovi
This slow, grooving version was a great song to start the morning with.

Within Your Reach - The Replacements
The sweeping guitar flanging makes me feel like twirling circles around in my room with my hands waiving hippie-like in the air.

Keep Yourself Alive - Queen
A steady driving beat perfect for that morning commute past cornfields and cows on two lane highways.

Mercy - Duffy
With the first bass notes, you might think it's Ben E. King's Stand By Me. But this sassy song puts me in a mood just right to catch up on work emails and mentally prepare myself for a day of nonsense.

Describe your musical morning...

Mess

I don't know when I changed, but I can tun into a sobbing mess in an instant. Movies, songs, commercials, Hallmark cards, you name it.

• Christian the Lion - When he runs into their arms... mess.
• World's Strongest Dad - When the dad carries his son across the finish line... huge mess.
• WALL-E - When Wall-e and Eva dance in space... ridiculous mess.
• Pedigree Commercial - Those puppy eyes...sobbing mess.
• U2 'Walk On' - Reminds me of September 11. "I know it aches, how your heart it breaks, you can only take so much..." singing mess.
• Ross and Rachel - The kiss everyone was waiting for... cheering mess.

What turns you into a mess?

Girl Power

The evening of my crappy day at work, I decided to treat myself to dinner and a movie. A popcorn dinner, that is. I went to see Sex In The City. I needed some girly time.

There was about a dozen people in the theater, and the estrogen was overwhelming. I had my tiny bag of popcorn, my legs were comfortably propped on the seat in front of me and the lights dimmed. I was ready to put behind the problems of the day and be absorbed in the lives of Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha. I missed those girls.

I loved watching SATC on HBO. It was the only reason that I actually subscribed to it. When SATC aired its final episode, HBO was canceled. But what I loved about the show was the relationships between them. They were so open, so honest. They shared the good and the bad. With one phone call, they could join forces and solve any crisis or heartbreak with a cosmopolitan, Manolos or brunch. They had a friendship that I envied.

I have friends and cousins who I am close to. We share personal stories, confide deepest secrets, laugh over embarrassing moments, or just wonder what kind of lives we will lead. But what seems strange to me is that there isn't one person who I share all aspects of those topics. I don't have one best friend, but a network of friends who get different bits and pieces of who I am.

I wonder why is that? Is it me? Do I chose to spread myself out so as not to get so deep with one person? Maybe. I can go weeks or months without speaking to some of my friends and not think twice about it because when we do get back in contact it's as if no time had ever past. To me that's special. Like the friendship is strong enough to not have to coddle or babysit it along the way.

I spend a lot of time by myself and for the most part, I enjoy it. I can do what I want, when I want, without having to ask for permission or arranging schedules. But when I want company, its hard trying to find the right girlfriend to invite. One's either too cranky, or too pregnant, too Mommy, or too married, or just too far away.

Then there are some friends who I dearly miss, but whose life have taken such a different path from mine that there is hardly anything left to talk about.

As Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte all mended to Carrie's broken heart, I wondered who of my friends would be there for me in my time of crisis? How have I made myself available to them?

So now I'm curious. What are your friendships like? Do you have that one best friend? Do you have a network of girlfriends who can tell you that yes, those pants really do make your ass look fat? Or do you flitter around like a butterfly to random groups of people who knew you at different points of your life?

Leave me a comment.

1st Annual NXLevel Golf Invitational

Friday turned into Fun-day as everyone in the office played hookey for an afternoon of mini-golf.

We left the office at noon for lunch at a local rib joint. Then we were off to the mini-golf place for some silliness. It was extremely hot out, about 95° and even though we were carting around plenty of beers with us, it was almost too hot to drink them... almost.

I was pulling some amazing shots out of my ass. Birdie, par. Across the course the other teams would hear "Claudine got 2!" and they would tremble in fear. Was I the next Tiger Woods?

Alas, they were not getting the full story. Among my super shots were also some 7, 8 and 9 stroke holes. Tiger can rest easy.

My overall score was somewhere in the 80's. But in the end, I was a winner. Winner of the highest score. If I'm going lose, then I'll lose the best!

Just one of those days

It's been a yucky day at work today trying to put out fires for a client. I will be happy when we figure this thing out and deliver a new package of files. Then I will have a beer, slouch in my chair, kick off my shoes and rub my belly. At work.

It started at 8:30am when I saw the message light was on. 'Client' was having problems with the course we delivered yesterday. It wasn't sending the completion data back to their database when the course was finished. But at one time, back in April, it did. What changed? Oh, and by the way. They are launching this course out to their public tomorrow. Go get to fixin'.

*Snap, snap*

So after I give 'Client' a call to confirm that I received her message and that I'm on the case, I bang my head on my desk. Crap. My two developers who worked on this project are not in the office. One's out sick, the other works from home on Thursday.

Immediately, I start with the emails telling the developer and the company partners what's going on and start with the investigating. Is it the code? What timestamp is it? Which was the last confirmed working version for them? This went on for about 3 hours back and forth on IM, email and phone.

Finally we uncover what may be the root of the problem. It was me. The last image change the client asked for affected an asset on the last page of the course. That last page asset was the way we were telling the client's database that the course was finished. When the asset was updated, I saved it as the wrong format, thus removing the completion code delivery. Double crap.

I had to join Client on a conference call this afternoon to provide an update as to what the issue was and what our solution would be. Luckily they weren't jerks about it, at least not on the phone to me. It was productive and forward-looking so I didn't feel on the defensive. Why can't all clients be like that? Although I'm sure as soon as they hung up the phone they were cursing me out. Come on, that's what I would do.

So now it's wait time for me as I stand by as the developer does his thing. This is the worst part for me, the waiting. Because I want to be doing something, but there's nothing that I can do.

This is one of those days where I wish I was 6 years old again and my only worry was what color crayon to use in my Barbie coloring book.

Places to see before I die

Ooops, didn't mean to have such a morbid title. But it's going to happen to us all one day, hopefully in the distant future. But while I'm here, I'd like to make it memorable.

I love to travel and whenever I find myself in Barnes & Noble, I often page through the book "1000 Places to Visit Before You Die". I feel all proud when I can say I've been there already. Some of those special places are:


London
I was first there in 2001 visiting Tom. I loved it! I've been back twice since.

Paris
Beautiful city. I loved just sitting at a sidewalk cafe people watching, writing in my journal and eating crepes with bananas and hazelnut. Yum.

La Mezquita, Spain
I traveled through Spain with my mom and my aunt. The Moorish architecture was really breath-taking.

Venice
A unique town that is lively and enchanting. Go there once in your life, or maybe twice like me.

I was in Costa Rica in April and I already have the travel bug.

My Top 10 Places to Next Visit

1. Machu Pichu, Peru - planning on going there next spring
2. Greece
3. Egypt
4. Petra, Jordan
5. Safari in Kenya, Africa
6. Australia and diving in the Great Barrier Reef
7. Hong Kong and the Great Wall of China
   
8. Taj Mahal, India
9. Rio de Janeiro
10. Ireland - to find me a nice Irish lad for my very own.

Where do you want to travel to?

Sorority Fag

You know sometimes how listening to a song can automatically transport you back to a specific time or place in your past? Well, this morning on the way to work I heard a song that brought me back to my sorority days. "Build Me Up Buttercup" by The Foundations.

I was a complete sorority fag. Each semester as part of Rush, we would make up songs to cheer as the Rushees came to visit our chapter house. The more fun and the more catchy the songs were, the better they were. I made up a song for to the tune of "Buttercup". Sing along with me please...

Why don't you come and see Alpha Xi, baby
Its the place for you, with a love so true
And best of all, we'll be around baby
If you ask us to, we'll stand by you
We want you, we want you
More than anyone, darlin'
You know that we have from the start.
So come and be, an Alpha Xi
Don't break our hearts.

This was a hit. I sang it so much that even now, I can't sing the real words to the song.

But my Rush song legacy was one I wrote to the tune of the "Always Coca-Cola" song. I taught this to chapters all over the Eastern states during a chapter president's conference one year.


The stars will always shine, the birds will always sing
With Alpha Xi Delta you're always the real thing
A sisterhood so true, we're all number one
As long as there is love, there's Alpha Xi Delta
Doo doo doo doo doo, We're Alpha Xi Delta

You can thank me later for putting these songs in your head.

Guitar Heros

Is this our musical future?

Poor-man's Therapy

I've been keeping a journal in one form or another, on and off, for quite a few years. Some have been public in a blog, but most of it has been private in my handwritten books.

I started keeping a journal simply as a way to remind myself of things I've done. I still have all my notes from middle and high school still folded up in those crazy origami patterns to make it impossible to open easy. I like to look back and laugh at that silly 14-year-old who thought she knew it all. Now the journals collect my thoughts, feelings, and recollections of crazy antics. It serves as my own time capsule.

I find that I write more often and more eloquently when I'm going though some sort of emotional change. Usually when I'm starting a new relationship or ending one, the entries become more heart-felt. The pages have become my therapist and I reveal my soul through the ink.

Samara O'Shea wrote about her keeping a journal, "So to me a journal is that place to be unabashedly honest with yourself, and it's dangerous because you won't always like what you see. You'll look at your thoughts and say, "I don't actually think that do I?" You do and it's fine."

She has a new book coming out Note to Self: On Keeping a Journal and Other Dangerous Pursuits that I'm interested in getting. In it she provides some suggestions and exercises:

• Write in a stream of consciousness: Forget everything you ever learned about writing and just write. Let it all out: the good, bad, mad, angry, boring, and ugly.
• Ask yourself questions: What do I want to change about myself? What would I never change about myself?
• Copy quotes: Other people's words can help you figure out where you are in life, or where you'd like to be.
• It takes time: Don't lose faith if you don't imme­diately feel better after writing in your journal. Think of each entry as part of a collection that will eventually reveal its meaning to you.

I like to write in my journal, but I would like to be able to leave my mark with some thing more substantial than nonsensical ramblings and sporadic pearls of wisdom. I want it to be something that will be insightful to future generations of my family. I want it to be a part of my legacy.

How about you? Why do you blog/journal?

On race

Classes have started up again and even though it's only been one week, I am surprised how interesting I think this class will be.

The Historical and Societal Foundations of Education course "explores the ways in which educational institutions, policies, and practices have emerged and developed, particularly in relation to changing social conditions and expectations". I'm sure I'll have more posts about the course and ideas that come out of it, but today I want to share an article that was mentioned in one of the class discussions.

White Privilege: Unpacking the Invisible Knapsack by Peggy McIntosh is a thought provoking piece that asks the question "what is it like to have white privilege"?

I have come to see white privilege as an invisible package of unearned assets that I can count on cashing in each day, but about which I was "meant" to remain oblivious. White privilege is like an invisible weightless knapsack of special provisions, maps, passports, codebooks, visas, clothes, tools , and blank checks.

What I found most provoking are McIntosh's list of 50 Daily Effects of White Privilege. It made me question my own identity.

I look, act and live white. But I am Latina, a 100% Puerto Rican. I may not be as dark skinned as my relatives and I might not speak Spanish, but I have Taino blood running though my veins. I have Boriqua pride: you better not mistake me for Dominican or Mexican! And I'm not an immigrant, dammit. We're Americans.

I've taken advantage of my ancestry when necessary, such as the full-tuition minority scholarship that got me through college. I also mark myself off as Hispanic on demographic questionnaires that also ask about my gender, income and education level -- more as a big Screw You to anyone who might want to otherwise think down at me solely because I'm a "minority".

But when it comes to everyday living, I can identify with each of those 50 conditions. And it made me feel sad and a little guilty, although guilty for what I don't really know.

Growing up, I don't think I was brought up to think any certain way about race. I don't remember specific beliefs or attitudes that I inherited from my family. I knew I was Puerto Rican because we would go there to see my grandparents and cousins often enough and I loved the rice and beans that my mom made, but I made no attempt to have that identifier tagged to me as a kid. I wanted to fit in as much as anyone else so I identified more with Madonna than Jennifer Lopez.

Today I try to judge others by their character, not by their skin. I try to look beyond stereotypes and see the person for who they are. I try not to tolerate injustices to anyone based on race, gender, religion, etc. But I realize that I have had advantages that other members of my extended family might not have simply because I'm not as tan and don't speak with an accent.

So now with this realization, what do I do with it? What can I do with it? I don't have a clue yet.

Qwirkle

At work, we normally play games during lunchtime. For a while we had played Chicken Foot, a variation on dominoes. But the new game we play now is Quirkle. It's a fun and addictive game where you have to match up color and/or shape tiles. It's like Scrabble and dominoes mashed together. Its fun for all ages.

What's frustrating is that Mike always wins. Who knew that he was actually smart. He hides it very well.

4th of July Weekend

I found a very cool site, Animoto. It takes your photos from your computer or from a sharing site and mashes it together with music (again from your computer or from their selection) to make really awesome videos.

Today's Horoscope

Today's horoscope. The universe is trying to tell me something I think.

It is a good day to focus on your health -- the clothes in your closet have not been shrinking, despite what you would like to think. Start keeping track of what you eat each day and how much exercise you get. You'll quickly see that there are painless changes you can make that will help you look better and feel better. Try nonfat milk in your coffee. Take the stairs instead of the elevator. Park at the far end of the parking lot. Treat your body like it's the only one you have -- because it is!

Analyze This

I signed up to use Google Analytics on this site a week or so ago, just to see if there is any traffic besides the small handful of friends who come here.

Under the keyword search area, my top two hits were 'penis' and 'big penis' respectively.

Awesome! And I owe it all to this post.

Pride and Prejudice

I've been doing some summer reading. Right now I have Jane Austin's Pride and Prejudice on my nightstand. I had never read any of her books in school and wanted to catch up on some classics.

I've been enjoying reading it, but Austin's language is so formal and flowery that sometimes I have to read and re-read a paragraph just to understand what the character is really saying.

Often I try and translate passages into modern language.

"Oh, my dear Eliza! pray make haste and come into the dining room, for there is such a sight to be seen! I will not tell you what it is. Make haste, and come down this moment."

Becomes this:

"Eliza! Get the hell down here. You've got to see this to believe this. Hurry the hell up!"

See how much better it flows?

A Day In The Life: Photo Journal

Today I took the challenge of journaling a day in my life only through photos.

View the slideshow.

Fashion Sense

Fashion Sense
Originally uploaded by bearclau

Sometimes I wonder if people actually look in the mirror before they go outside.

I <3 Facebook

I was 'friended' this week by a friend from high school who I haven't heard from since he graduated 18 years ago. The beep on my Blackberry went off at 6:45 am and immediately I had to check and see what was going on. There was the message..."Craig Watkinson wants to be your friend".

What?! I reached over and grabbed my laptop lying on the floor next to my bed and fired it up.

Holy crap, he's in LA acting and teaching, has a beautiful wife, and he's HOT!! He even has his own IMDB page. Let the cyber-stalking begin. He's now my secret married boyfriend. (Secret because he doesn't even know it.)

Of course I told the idiots (aka Mike and Steve) at work and was immediately ridiculed. "Did you actually know him in high school, or did you just pass in the halls. If we were to call him right now and mention your name, would he have any clue who we were talking about?"

Oh whatever.

An excerpt from what he wrote in my yearbook:

...Being "Clau'd" was the best thing that ever happened to me (even though you missed my 'special spot'). Your calves rule! You are like Calvin, Hobbes and Bart all rolled up into one. Your wild nature magnifies my heart like an old man with sneakers (?). I love you more than you know!...

The crazy part was that I never knew any of this while we were in school. We were friends who kidded around and it was usually me who was the butt of the jokes.

Ah well, you live, you learn. But what I wouldn't give to hop into a DeLorean to go back to 1990 just so see how things could have been different.

All thanks to Facebook.

(Hooop!)

silly

Sometimes I come across things that just make me laugh out loud for no reason.

This is one of them.

Wimp Nation

I just read an article on Time.com, that talked about how parents are over-coddling their children, thus kids today have less defined coping mechanisms. I think it comes down to consequences -- kids no longer understand that actions come with consequences. And it is those consequences, specifically the bad ones, that really teach the greatest lessons in life.

Just this weekend, I went to my 7 year old cousin's baseball game. There was no score kept. An inning consisted of each child getting up to bat -- a three-out inning didn't exist. A kid was in the batters' box until he got a hit -- there were no strikes or balls. I understand that at an early age, little league is about learning the fundamentals, but that also includes the rules of the games. Players strike out, teams lose.

When I was younger, things were much different.

Then		Now
We drank from the garden hose, shared lunches in school, and mom's cleaned our dirty faces with spit.		It's bottled water only, custom gluten-free, peanut-free, and dairy-free lunches, and mega-sized Purell bottles.
We would meet our friends in the neighborhood park to play.		Parents set up play dates.
Acting up in class got us detention.		Acting up in class gets you Ritalin
We rode our bikes everywhere.		They get driven everywhere.
Talking back or being a brat got us smacked.		Talking back or being a brat gets them 'a stern talking to'.
Coming home with a bad grade got us grounded.		Coming home with a bad grade gets the teachers suspended.

What I don't get is that it's my generation that became the parents who coddle. Why? When did we turn all crazy and think that the world is only made up of lollipops and rainbows? Shouldn't a parents' job be to prepare their children for the real world? In the real world there are no do-overs, no game resets. You hit the ball, or you strike out. No one owes us anything, you have to go out and get it.

If I had a kid, that's the way it would be. No wimps in my house.

modesty

Friday night after work, I had the boys over for some casual nonsense. We were entertaining ourselves reading the trivia questions from Trivial Pursuit: Totally 80's and I was tearing 'em up. Steve was flabbergasted at my wealth of useless knowledge.

Me: "I have all the answers, I just need the right questions."

Poll Results

What was the first concert I went to?

• New Kids On The Block
• Motley Crue
• Bon Jovi
• Bruce Springsteen.

The answer is...

Bon Jovi on the Slippery When Wet tour in 1987.

My best friend Shelly got tickets for our 8th grade graduations. Her two 'cool' aunts were taking her and she gave the extra ticket to me. The experience was amazing.

We were at the Brendan Byrne Arena (now known as the Continental Arena) and our seats were all the way on the other side of the stage, at the very top. They sucked. All the pot smoke wafted up there as well, but I was too young and naive to know anything about that.

Shelly and I wore our bootleg Bon Jovi t-shirts and our matching fedora hats -- just like Vince Neil wore in the 'Home Sweet Home' video. Our hair was perfectly teased and feathered and our jeans were tight.

The crowd around us was fun and crazy. We screamed for Jon and his awesome hair and cute butt. We pined for the quiet, sensitive Richie. We danced and sang at the top of our lungs and hi-fived neighbors when 'Raise Your Hands' or 'You Give Love a Bad Name' was played.

But the ultimate concert moment for two 14 year old girls from New Jersey was when Jon was strapped into the harness and flew out over the crowd during 'Living On A Prayer'.




Oh, those were the days...

Poetry Jam: 1987

I wanted to write something, but I couldn't figure out what I want to write. So instead, I pulled out my poem journal from when I was in 8th grade. Remember those teenage years where every heartache was a complete tragedy and the only way for your soul to be healed was to write a poem? Oh yeah, you know you did it too...

First Night
(January 1987)

Please don't try and tempt me
Right now I must be strong.
Should I let my passion guide me
And my temptation carry me on?

You make it so hard to resist
That pleading look in your eyes.
Are you as caring and warm as you seem,
Or a devil in disguise?

Maybe I'm not just ready yet
Please try and understand
Because I'm still a little girl
And you're not yet a man.

The first night should be special
Everything should turn out right.
We'd stare into each other's eyes,
Then turn out the light.

But how do you know
That nothing will go wrong?
If you love me, then you'll wait for me
When I'm ready I'll go along.

Until that special day comes
Just stay with me.
That first night will come soon enough
Together, you and me.

Poll Results

Finally, the poll answer...

Which 80's heartthrob fan club was I a member in?

• Kirk Cameron
• Ricky Schroder
• John Stamos
• Michael J. Fox

And the answer is Ricky Schroder!

Yes, I was in his fan club. Which really was just a ploy to get an autographed picture signed 'The Ricker'.

Oh, I loved him in those Silver Spoons days.

a typical conversation: part 4

Mike is sitting on my desk talking about... whatever. Steve comes by and sprays him with canned air.

Me: "Dude, Steve just blew you."

Mike: "Yeah, I'm very unfulfilled."

Geek out

I have been attending grad school for the past 3 years for my masters in education. Specifically for Instructional Design for Online Learning. I came into it by accident, but I really enjoy it. I took the last 6 months off from taking classes, but I start up again in 2 weeks. I'm only 12 credits away from being done.

At work I've been taking a stronger role in advocating better use of instructional design in the development of our courses. I've posted articles to our intranet blog, I've given presentations to my office on the evolution of our courses, I've complained loudly on the crappiness of the courses sent by our content partners that we have to build.

Now the powers-that-be have started to take notice. I was asked to contribute to an RFP for a client about the levels of user interactivity. I went to town rewriting what they were originally going to use. I researched, incorporated the characteristics of adult learners, and came up with a piece that completely ROCKED!

See for yourself. Levels of User Interactivity.

Would you rather...

Here are some conversation starters when waiting in line, waiting for a meeting to start, or when that uncomfortable silence occurs on a first date:

Would you rather...

• Develop the worst case of acne ever on record
  -OR-
  have your spouse suffer with it?
  
  
• Be on vacation with your 60 year-old parents and have your mom insist on wearing a thong bikini
  -OR-
  have your dad insist on wearing a tiny, Euro-style bikini bathing suit?
  
  
• On a first date, wear a T-shirt that says, "I'm With Stupid"
  -OR-
  a T-shirt that asks, "Who Cut the Cheese"?

Discuss among yourselves.

50 things

I have been challenged. Here are 50 things about me.

1. I once cried out of getting a speeding ticket.
2. I got my tattoo on Christmas Eve when I was 19. It's a dolphin near my 'special place'.
   
3. It took me 6 years to admit to my parents I had it.
4. I was the chapter president of my sorority when I was a sophomore.
5. I learned more from that experience than from any of my classes.
   
6. I am thankful I traded in a boyfriend for my dog.
7. I spent two months in a wheelchair after tearing both of my achillies tendons.
8. I would rather text or email than talk on the phone.
9. I can't watch scary movies, especially the supernatural kind. They give me horrible nightmares.
10. I still bite my nails.
11. I've road tripped to Key West, around the Midwest and traveled to Europe and the ABC islands all on my own.
12. I rode in a hot air balloon.
13. I crapped in a sink on my 21st birthday.
    
14. I know how to swing dance.
15. I played the violin in elementary school. I was awesome.
16. I go indoor rockclimbing.
17. I believe God is a woman and she doesn't care what religion you are.
    
18. I have been to the Moulin Rouge in Paris, but don't remember it all because I was hammered.
19. I tend to pick up foreign accents easily, especially when I'm drunk. I do Australian and Irish in certain company.
20. I have been to Stonehenge, the rock of Gibraltar, the Alhambra, the Colosseum and to Mayan pyramids.
21. New York City is my most favorite place in the world.
22. I've been to over 20 Bruce Springsteen concerts and they never get old.
23. I've hacked into an ex-boyfriend's email and got caught.
24. I got certified for SCUBA three summers ago. I love it.
    
25. I love snowboarding but don't go as often as I'd like.
26. I lead my high school softball team in stolen bases.
    
27. In high school, I was nominated for Homecoming Queen but didn't win.
    
28. My first car was an '87 Firebird; gray with t-tops. I loved that car.
29. I said I've been in love many times, but now I wonder how many times it was true.
30. I hate cats.
31. Past jobs include: waitress, movie concession stand cashier and popcorn maker, that person who gives out samples of food at Costco, and door-to-door vacuum salesperson (that didn't last long).
32. My cousins are my closest friends.
33. I've danced on stage at Jenkinsons.
34. I probably think I'm funnier than I really am.
35. I'm guilty of drunk dialing/texting.
36. I'm not as close to my parents/brother as I'd like to be.
37. I bought my own townhouse when I was 30.
38. I still don't know what I want to be when I grow up.
39. This election will be the first where I vote for a Democrat as opposed to voting against a Republican.
40. I can't wait for Bush to be out of office.
41. I do my own Tarot cards.
42. I think I have cute toes.
43. I wish I spoke better Spanish.
44. I have never been in a fist fight.
45. I've tried pot, but didn't like it.
46. I hate puking out my nose.
47. Stupid movies and dog food commercials can make me cry.
48. I have a girl crush on Angelina Jolie.
49. I am a Twitter addict.
50. I get bored really easily.

Ok bloggers, your turn!

thou shall not judge

I was about to respond to Viv when I read the post she pointed me to and read this:

Oh and when I went to the ticket counter and said “One for Sex and the City” the guy in the ticket booth said (fucking seriously, people) “Oh, I could see that coming a mile away”. Like…what-the-fuck, guy-selling-tickets? You’re judging me for seeing Sex and the City? You work in a box, dude.

That's why I always buy my tickets from the automated machine in the lobby.

Hopewell, NJ

I work in a tiny, picturesque town. Mike and I often take walks during lunch for a little exercise. Here's a little of the cuteness that I pass.

Thin is NOT me

I was behind this car on the way into work yesterday. It was mocking me.

a typical conversation: part 3

The stupidity keeps on going. This time it's all me.

Mike: "There you go, throwing out terms that you know nothing about: mask, project management..."

Me: "Yeah, I fake it a lot."

D'oh. That's when I just walked away.

Top 10 Songs

I was introduced to a blog recently and one of the questions posted was "What 10 songs would be on a CD that represented the music that you love?"

Recently (as in the last 6 years or so), I've been drawn to music that is heavy on acoustic guitars. Not necessarily an entirely acoustic song, but something that really brings the soul of the singer/songwriter out through the speakers.

1. Born To Run - Bruce Springsteen
   Getting Bruce on the list is a must. But I love this song for the hope that it contains. That all you need to get though in life is a lover, a car, and an open road. Plus after seeing him play it in concert 20+ times, there's this sense of belonging when the entire stadium sings it all together.
   
2. Solsbury Hill - Peter Gabirel
   Another song that makes you just want to drive in a convertible with the wind whipping through your hair. I was introduced to this song my freshman year of college by Pat. He had such a great taste in music and I'm glad that's one of the effects he had on me.
   
3. World Spins Madly On - The Weepies
   Perfect for a lazy Sunday morning when all you want to do is sit quietly outside, enjoying the peaceful simplicity of the world, with a lemonade and your dog sleeping on your lap. First heard this song while I rented Scrubs for a weekend-long marathon.
4. And We Danced - Hooters
   As soon as the drums kick in, I want to jump up and dance around the room spinning wildly. Listening to the Hooters brings be instantly back to high school. Good times.
5. Midnight Blue - Lou Gramm
   Back when MTV actually played videos, this was a favorite that was on the rotation. It had the same theme as Born To Run: bad-boy gets good-girl and they drive off together into the night.
6. More Time - Needtobreathe
   The acoustic guitar doesn't get lost on this one. From the "P.S. I Love You" soundtrack it plays into the storyline beautifully. But it also reminds me of the hope and promise of relationships.
   
7. New York, New York - Ryan Adams
   A rocker that came out in September 2001, this song to me was a tribute to the scarred city that I loved. "I'll always love you though, New York".
8. Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard & Marketa Irglova
   I LOVED the movie Once and this song was a key reason. Not only is the song beautiful and sweet but Glen is an amazing singer. I had the great opportunity to see him play live last fall and was blown away by the raw passion he puts into his voice. Another reason to love the Irish.
   
9. Let My Love Open The Door - Pete Townshend
   Silly, fun and makes you want to bop your head around like a bobble-head. My prince charming will serenade me with this song, or at least play it on his boombox raised over his head ala Say Anything.
   
10. Shelter From The Storm - Bob Dylan
    Yes, this was in Jerry Maguire, but despite that, it's another beautiful, guitar tune where you can actually understand what Bob is singing.

What are your top 10 songs?

a typical conversation: part 2

Mike has a wealth of stupid things he says.

On talking about wearing Oakley sunglasses during baseball games in high school:

"Those things were great! Do you know how many balls I took to the face..."

me: "...um..."

Mike: "shut up."

a typical conversation

On a sweltering afternoon, Mike and I walked to the convenience store for an ice cream bar.

He stops, yanks on his shorts and shakes his leg. "My junk is sticking to my leg."

"Boxer-briefs, Mikey. That's the way to go."

"I normally do wear boxer-briefs, but it's laundry day and all I have are my flaming heart boxers."

"Aww. Mikey has a heart-on."

today's horoscope

I am happy with today's horoscope:

There is a new, fresh and light kind of energy coming into your life. It will be just what you need to get through the next few heavy days. The sunshine outside won't be any match for the sunshine in your heart. You've feeling more connected to the people you love and able to rise above any pettiness or drama that might be erupting around you. This healthy perspective will help you put things in the right order, priority-wise. You'll finally make that tough decision you've been mulling over.

Now I just have to figure out what that tough decision actually is.

clau

family moments

I'm so glad to have grown up when I did. Being a teenager in the 80's just seemed so much easier. No cell phones, no internet, no IM. And most important, no videocamera in my little brother's hand.

Thank god this wasn't my family.