Wednesday, December 07, 2011


I should be working. I should be writing content for a high-profile training course I'm working on. I should be researching correct financial terminology and supporting documentation.

I should be giving a shit.

But I just can't do it!

Instead I've been paying more attention to things that I'm more interested in. And none of it is related to my job and certainly not related to my project. This is killing me.

Just this weekend I had a mini-crisis because I felt overwhelmed and under-qualified for this project. And now I'm slacking as if I have all the time in the world.

I am a procrastinator who loves to play with fire.


  1. I hate when I lapse into that mode. You have so much to do but - ooh, a shiny ball!

    My only suggestion is to set minor milestones. If I write this paragraph, I get to play on the internet for ten minutes. When I've done this, I eventually settle back into a more productive pattern.

  2. I set all of my clocks forward by an hour. This keeps me in a regular state of panic requiring a responsible course of action as a default mode.

    I also raise the intensity of my voice in the form of parroting back a response in the form of a loud question in every situation without reason to ensure other people don't waste my time, "Hello? I don't have time for hello? We can say hello when we are DEAD!"

    Then, I put calendar reminders of a non-busy variety into my outlook, so I get these nice little pop-up motivational messages periodically throughout the day, "You had better get back to work!"

    Finally, I leave voicemails as if from my future self to help me kick it into gear, "Ends up you don't amount to anything and google called, they said nobody is reading your blog and they want their internet back. Don't forget to pick up milk."

    If none of that works, I leap out of my cube and sprint a lap around the building while mentally forcing myself to think about stuff I hate doing: cleaning the bathroom, vacuuming out my car, going to dinner with that friend who won't stop talking about their own life and never asks how I am doing.

    By the time I get back from the sprint, maybe the work I am dodging doesn't look so bad anymore. Alternatively, all of this work to help me stay on task often keeps me from actually getting my work done and before I know it, it is 5pm and I am going home (only to realize later, it is actually 4pm, I've left early, and I shouldn't have changed the time on all my clocks).

    (fart sound)